It is a being that, believing it to be mythological, goes unnoticed. From his anonymity he observes all of us who live in San Miguel de Allende, and tells me his stories to write about here.
By Fernando Helguera
This week, the Black Unicorn decided to get to know the surroundings of San Miguel and so he arrived at the hot springs of La Gruta. Although this place lacked an experienced architectural team, one can have a great time. He arrived early in the morning with a dog cold, but he ran to the water because the dogs chased him when they saw him so small and appetizing. People of different nationalities coexisted amicably in the first pool, which he crossed to get into the tunnel that leads to the vault, where the jet of thermal water comes out and where it all begins.
A column in the center gives it a mystical air, and the floor around it is made of stones that massage the feet. There is a line for the jet and people take turns passing through. The Unicorn saw in line a man he had heard say he was from Querétaro, and behind him an old American lady with a strange expression on her face. At a certain moment his partner arrived and approached him, as he was waiting for both of them, she had gone to the bathroom it seemed. The American woman aggressively tapped the woman on the shoulder and told her to get in line. It was the man’s turn, to pass the squirt, and he called to his wife, who had moved away to the back of the line, for her to pass, as she was hurting her back. The foreigner said that the jet was about to be closed and to hurry, and since that was her attitude from the beginning, all the Mexicans present were already upset.
The woman passed and the man went to the back of the line; contrary to what the lady predicted, the jet was still open when it was his turn. The couple exited the vault and the Unicorn watched as others arrived in line. The lady kept lining up again and again.
Because it was so hot, the Unicorn decided to go out to the other pools that had a cooler temperature. There he saw the couple chatting amiably with other Mexicans and some foreigners, making friends.
Then he returned to the vault and saw that the jet was still open; the lady’s haste was just neurosis. At one point the person on duty was distracted to move to the jet and she rudely clapped her hands to hurry him. The man from Queretaro arrived again at the vault, now without his wife, and lined up. The lady was in the jet and when she came out, he formed up again and remained behind him. They continued advancing and when the man came out of the jet, instead of forming in line, he stood in front of the jet to massage his feet on the stone floor.
It was the queretaro’s guy turn and he stepped in. The lady started yelling at him not to get in, and he told her that he was respecting the order and was also waiting for the jet; everyone present agreed with him and he got in. The lady freaked out and shoved the man. He got very upset and pushed her in turn to get her away from the jet, telling her that she was rude and that she should go to her country, although he was sure that she could not make a living there and that is why she came to Mexico. She didn’t understand Spanish well and it was better to throw herself on him, which he prevented by stretching out his arm; because she was small she couldn’t reach him.
The guy from Queretaro fed up, let her pass. She turned around and told the man, laughing contemptuously, that she had her jet there. He told her to go fuck her mother and she was very offended, but did not know how to respond in the language of the country to which she had emigrated. The man from Queretaro left, telling her that people like that should be deported for being abusive. The Unicorn, when he saw that the lady began to explain herself to the other people, left as well. He felt sorry for the woman.
In the tunnel on the way back he wondered why some arrogant foreigners want to set their rules being foreigners. All Mexicans welcome them very well and many respect that, and do their part to make a better place. He thought those good expats could teach the other immigrants not to yell at the cashier at the supermarket, not to insult the waiters, and not to push people around.
The Unicorn returned home very relaxed, and happy that in San Miguel what prevails are friendly local and foreign people, willing to be friends, and few of them have to go back to their countries.
